The Mysterious Beings are rapidly staking a claim to world leadership in the genre of songs with three syllable girl’s names as titles. First there was “Valerie,” now “Gillian.” Rumors are flying regarding what’s next, with Millicent, Hyacinth, Imogen and Ermentrude reported to be amongst the front runners.

Talking of rumors, the band is taking no official position on suggestions that the scoundrel alluded to in the song is none other than our own keyboard player and well-known cad and bounder Gene Poole-Skimmings, who once made a girl called Gillian pay for her own curry in the Star of Bengal restaurant in Glasgow after it became apparent that the intestinal effects of the prawn vindaloo she had just eaten appeared likely to thwart his amorous intents for later in the evening. In fact, he made her pay for his too by climbing out the window of the gents’ lavatory. The fact that he pulled the same stunt with a girl called Millicent accounts for her position as three-to-one favorite in the betting for our next song title.

Listening tip – your pleasure, if any is to be derived from this production, will be enhanced by putting aside the notion that the lyric refers to Gene Poole-Skimmings’ appalling curry-related behavior. There is something deeper at work here, surely, and the affected organ is the heart, not the stomach. To be honest, the ear takes a bit of a bashing too with my vocals.

You can also listen at SoundCloud.

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