With their latest song, “Modern Lovers,” The Mysterious Beings once again showcase their ability to be very silly indeed. Listener discretion is advised LOL.

Keen followers of the band will know just how much I have always deplored the amorous antics of our notorious pianist, Gene Poole Skimmings, known throughout the music industry and beyond as The Sleaze of the Keys. Some of those antics have been documented here. It came as no surprise, then, that Gene is a big fan of dating apps. He’s on them all, including some catering to niche tastes that few others have heard of. The other day, I found him trying to explain some of these niches to a visibly shocked Aldo Sachs, our alto sax player. That gave me the idea for one of the verses in this song, although I changed Gene’s name to protect the band’s reputation. See if you can guess which verse it is. Then I added some others and composed this commentary on modern love. Aldo took several days to recover from what he had seen, so there is no sax here.

And ladies, if you swipe in the wrong direction when encountering Gene’s profile, don’t say you weren’t warned.